A puke and rally fail

Racine was a last minute add. Well, last minute as in the last three weeks. I registered so late I didn't even have my name on my bib, wasn't on the t-shirt and had to fill out my medical form when I arrived.

The weather shaped up for a great race day. It was a pretty smooth swim, not the waves like usual, the bike was mild and the run wasn't nearly as hot as previous years.

I had a great weekend. Good company, great to see the crew: Glenn, David, BMayes and Tom (the carny as I found out they sometimes call themselves. lol) and I finally realized why I do triathlon.

I've struggled since I started to really be able to answer anyone when they ask "Why." Well, it came to me in a moment of clarity in the shower Saturday morning. I do it because it makes me happy.

Saturday night after my usual pre-race meal I wasn't feeling super swell. It carried into Sunday morning. My stomach as feeling like it did before RAIN last Saturday. This time I was able to keep food down, but ate super slow and had to take small bites. As we were walking to transition, I started getting cold sweats. It was a perfect morning, no reason for sweating of any kind.

The swim was butt ass cold at 61.4 degrees. I wore my wetsuit, a single cap, ear plugs and booties. It took me about 500 meters to get my shit together and keep my face consistently in the water, before that it was a lot shitty freestyle mixed with breast stroke. I think a lot of people were on the struggle bus as the water was pretty choppy and so that didn't feel so great on my stomach. After that I probably had the most focused swim I've had yet, I swam buoy to buoy, no stopping or poking around until I got to the orange buoy 6. (Shiny object moment: There are no greater sights in a triathlon than the finish line and the first orange buoy. That's the buoy that means you're halfway.)

I started getting cramps in my hamstrings, a new one for me. The kind of cramps where your entire leg freezes up and you get this second of panic that you'll sink. But you bob in your wetsuit and stretch. Happened a few times then I was back on my way. My swim was meh. 5 minutes slower than goal. It's a pretty long climb off the beach and back to transition.

I saw Glenn in transition and he told me I can pick it up on the bike. I headed out on the bike and my stomach wasn't feeling great. The bike course has a lot of bumps in the pavement, but nothing much worse than what we ride every day in the country roads. But the bumps didn't make for fun times with my stomach. I feel some cramps coming on my calves and Achilles. I took some extra salt to stay ahead of it. The entire ride the cramps never set in, just teased. The first 20 miles I had a very consistent pain in my lower right side. It felt like I was going to give birth to the devil or something with horns out my side. After the first aid station it went away. My stomach still hurt but there would be stretches of 4 or 5 minutes when I felt okay so I would hammer it. Then I would back off when I wasn't feeling as well. There were a few false flat hills but other than that, bike wasn't bad. A lot of turns, but most of them wide and gravel free. I played cat and mouse with a few people and then finally pulled ahead. (A few of them later told me when they passed me on the run that once I pulled away I was GONE, I told them and you're catching me on the run; bike for show, run for dough.) I knew my bike wasn't as strong as it should have been but it wasn't awful. I saw BMayes twice on the bike and it made me smile. (Another shiny object moment: I was disappointed to see how many people had ear buds for the bike and the run. Doesn't anyone follow the rules?)

As I was coming into transition I knew that between cramps and my stomach I was going to have to piece a miracle together to make this run happen. I said a little prayer to God as I got off. I ran past Tom and he said he was going to radio to David that I was off the bike, I heard it as I ran off and it made me smile. I was behind my goal time on the swim and bike, but not by too much, a sub 8 hour finish was still in the cards. That was my goal for the day, which few people knew.

I stuck to my 3/1 plan on the run. Taking a few more walk breaks in the first mile to catch my breath. As I got to mile two the cramps started working themselves out and my legs started to feeling better. The first mile was the slowest and then I started picking up pace. I even got to see Brian finishing the run, which I don't think has ever happened. Hitting 15's at the end of mile 3. Legs were actually feeling good and dropping to a sub 15 between 3 and 4. Then before mile 4 I felt my stomach wasn't going to cooperate unless I did something. I stopped at a Port O Let and nothing. I was just shy of mile marker 4 and was doubled over thinking I was going to puke. Someone screamed "puke and rally." Which was my plan. I decided to move over the side of the road and I started throwing up. 3 or 4 times, I lost count, but bad enough that another athlete felt the need to tell medic, who came up behind me. They gave me some perform to drink, I took a few sips down and felt better. I actually started running and feeling okay. Sweet, puke and rally worked! So maybe a sub 8 is gone, but a PR (from 8:19 in Cedar Point) is totally still do-able.

Then sometime after 4.5 I puked up the perform. I sipped some water and walked toward mile 5. Then I puked again. I sat on the curb this time and put my head down. Someone came by and said "turn your head, your shoes are too pretty to puke on." lol The medic came by again and gave me perform. I walked toward the turn around, but as I got to the zoo, I threw up again. So talked to the medic AGAIN and decided to walk in to the medic station at the finish line and call it a day. I was so hoping I would run into someone I knew to talk it through logically, did I have to quit? Couldn't I keep going?

I started sobbing like a baby at that point. The stubborn side of me DID NOT want to quit. I had 3 hours until the course closed, plenty of time to walk the rest of the race. But was it smart to walk that far if I couldn't keep liquids down? I felt okay otherwise and was walking at an okay pace. But what would I be like in 2 hours?

Some lady stopped and asked what was wrong. I told her, she said try flat coke, always soothes upset stomachs. Oh yeah! The one thing I hadn't tried. That would work! I walked past the finish line and headed to the aid station at the run turn around. I took some flat coke and sipped it slowly as I walked up the hill toward the rest of the run course. Then I started cramping in my calves. I got maybe .25 miles and it started to come back up. Fuck. It didn't work. And now I'm cramping with no way to stop it.

So I turned around and walked with people who were less than half a mile from finishing their race (or starting their 2nd lap). Since I still had my timing chip on, I took the path that was above the finish line and walked through the park to the medic tent. I sat down and immediately starting crying so hard they couldn't understand a single word I was saying. Crying although no tears were coming out, I'm not sure I've ever experienced that. I was SO DISAPPOINTED to end the day this way. They gave me an anti-nausea medicine and made me drink perform before I could leave.

As I left the medic tent I ran into Glenn. He gave me the biggest hug as I started crying again. He gave me the best pep talk. Asking me what were my goals for the year? Finish IMKS and IMAZ. Racine wasn't in there, this was an add-on. It doesn't matter. I'm half way to my goal, focus on that. He and David couldn't wait to greet me at the finish in Arizona. They didn't love me any less because of today. He said something that made me laugh and cry. As I handed Glenn my timing chip, I joked that we should find Tom to come take it since he's always taken it before. hahaha

Such good people. I got a nice text from David and a message from BMayes. Lots of encouraging messages from people. One of our Resident Members wrote me a super sweet note about how I inspire her. Tri Brian was kind enough to get all my shit out of transition earlier in the day and assured me that a DNF didn't matter and not to think twice about it. I give Brian a lot of shit, but when it matters he's always there to support me.

I thought back over my race, a sub 8 was not impossible, even if it was a slow day for me based on time. I need to let this go. Learn from it what I can, go see a dr. to see what the issue is and keep moving forward. Keep working on improving so that finish in Arizona is a great as it can be. Not to be on the struggle bus, enjoy the day, smile and race. Celebrate the glory with people who are as excited as I am for the finish.

Disappointed my puke and rally days might be over. I could rally like a champ in my drinking days.

There was an opportunity to post this on an Ironman board today. While there's still a lot of work to be done, I can't forget to look back at progress and use that to inspire me to keep moving forward. Lots of great things ahead.