Expectation. Bet you didn't think that's what I was going to say!
"Today's expectations are tomorrow's resentments"
Expectation is a terrible word. It's dirty and brings on nothing but bullshit, upset and resentment.
I spent some time on Georgia Street this weekend and I cleaned out some drawers. Both brought back memories and caused me to reflect. The word "expectations" kept popping back up.
So many of us are guilty of it, setting expectations for experiences or people; neither we can control. I can have expectations of myself, but even then, those are sometimes hard to manage. We've all been let down by expectations. Hell, I've probably let you down at some point based on expectations. Well, I know I have. Ironman Arizona, a lot of people had high expectations for me to have an official finish and I didn't meet those expectations.
I think back to all the times I had resentment and I can link nearly every time back to an expectation. So many of our actions are linked to expectations. Help someone, expect a thank you. Do something nice for someone, expectations are set to get a thanks or a favor back. But why are we really doing it? Looking at one's motives are a good way to keep your expectations in check. I make a decision to do something for someone. I cannot expect an thank you. If I do, then my motives were not purely set on helping someone else with no gain, return or accolade.
I think to some of the times I've been the shittiest to be around. It's because I had expectations and they were not met. Not even close to being met. Maybe the opposite of my expectations ended up happening. And my mood changed on a dime, because I can be a moody if I'm pushed enough.
On the flip side, some of the best times I've had have been times when I didn't have any expectations.
I did a good job for a while trying not to have expectations when I shouldn't. But the little shits have crept back in. I think it's a conscious effort not have expectations. I'm in a better place when I drop expectations and really watch my motives. That's something I'm going to work on again in 2014.
What does this have to do with training? not a damn thing.
